Remembering Dad

In a short three week period of time, I was very fortunate to get to know many people from Samaritan Hospice. They were a God-send to my dad and me. My dad was diagnosed with 4th stage pancreatic cancer in April 2007. Immediately he started a very aggressive plan to treat the cancer. As time progressed, so did the cancer. By August, he was getting weaker and by September it was time to contact hospice.

As my mom had passed away twenty years ago and not having any brothers or sisters, I was always my dad’s primary caregiver. Things in the past were nothing to what I was experiencing this time. I was having a hard time coping with what was happening before my eyes. But from the first day working with you, I felt a sense of comfort and support. Both my dad and I were treated with the utmost respect. It was what my dad deserved. He was a phenomenal man.

My dad’s nurse was Karen. I had come to rely on her and wait for her every visit. She was here for me as much as my dad. She always explained everything thoroughly and never rushed us along. As the second week approached, my dad was worse. One day he begged me to call Karen – he just wanted to see her. She had already come earlier that day but she stopped again just to talk to him. It made him feel relaxed and comforted. She gave him so much in his final days.

His last five days were spent in the In-Care Patient Unit at Virtua. What a wonderful facility. I spent my dad’s final days by his side. The entire staff was unbelievable. Every person that walked into that room, from the cleaning person to his nurses just had such a calming, gentle way about them. It helped me tremendously in dealing with my dad’s eventual death. What you do for people is wonderful. I would have never survived this without your support, guidance and knowledge. I’m truly blessed to have been touched by Samaritan Hospice.

Fondly,

Kelly DeStefano

One Daughter's Experience

The following is a letter that Samaritan Hospice President/CEO Mary Ann Boccolini received from a woman whose mother was cared for at the Samaritan Inpatient Hospice Center in Mt. Holly. She has given permission for us to share this letter, in the hopes that her experience may help others.

Dear Ms. Boccolini:

While there really are no words to express our appreciation, we would like to take this opportunity to convey our heartfelt thanks to Samaritan Hospice during our Mother’s final illness.

From our first conversation with the administrative staff and Dr. Goldfine, we were impressed with the care and compassion expressed with regard to our situation.

Mom was brought to the Samaritan Inpatient Unit on June 18th for what we thought would be some pain management issues over a period of five to seven days, after which time she would move to a respite program with the hope she would one day return home. Within minutes of arriving, she fell in love with the room and its bright, sunny color and homey warmth and once she received her first pain shot, she exclaimed with elation that for the first time since February, she was pain free. While the nurses thought that she would soon sleep from the pain relief, she chattered with us for hours and ate a full, delicious dinner since she felt so great.

She said she was in heaven and never wanted to leave. We tried to explain that this was a temporary stop, but she continued to tell us that she had no plans to leave such a wonderful place that took such good care of her and with such fabulous people. Little did we know that she would get her wish. Sometime during the night of the 20th she went to sleep with a smile on her face, happy and pain free and with a stomach full of Virtua’s scrumptious food.

The care, knowledge, attention and guidance bestowed upon our Mother and our family was invaluable and beyond measure. Samaritan eased the burden and removed the fear that occurs when the death of a loved one is near. The emotional support provided all of us was as vital as the medical assistance and superlative nursing care. Whether it was the doctors, the nursing staff, the chaplain staff, the music therapy staff or the administrative staff, everyone was tremendous. If we start to name everyone by name, we might miss someone… but know all those names remain dear within our hearts. They guided us through each step of Mom’s death as they best could when dealing with nature and allowed us to accept it on our own terms and within our own time. Samaritan Hospice, along with God, taught us to accept patience and Mom’s control of her last journey.

Every staff member we met was an “angel of mercy.” They were always available yet respectful of our personal time with Mom. Their spirits remained upbeat and each and every one of them had a smile on their face and joy in their voice when they spoke to Mom. They did their best to “guide” us through this transition yet made it quite clear that whatever and however the family chose to go through this process was the right and meaningful way.

While the first few days were solemn, the tide turned when her five year old granddaughter arrived for a visit and began to sing her camp songs. From there on out, laughter and memorable stories enveloped the room, and through tears we sang, danced, watched her favorite movies, looked at photos from a recent party she had attended and paid tribute to her every way we could think of. Friends came and went freely to say their final goodbyes and while we are a small family, we had a standing-room crowd many times filled with our wonderful friends.

While I don’t think any of us knew what to expect when we embarked with Mom on her final journey, this time could not have been more perfect and we will cherish this week as we cherish everything else that made our lives rich with Mom. We wondered if her own funeral service could be as fulfilling and give us as much closure as we had with her in that room. Yet her funeral service was beautiful and uplifting We asked everyone to wear bright clothes to honor her (which was something that we started talking about over the week when we saw how death truly could be a celebration of who one was and one’s life) and she had even left a letter with the Church that was read at the service, so we got to hear from her one last time!!

We feel extremely blessed that this program and facility was available to us in our time of need. While “thank you” seems so trite, we will hold each and every one of you in our prayers and remain grateful for the strength your staff has in working at Samaritan Hospice. Be assured that allowing us to remain together as a family until the very end is the greatest gift to be given by anyone.

Again, thank you. May God’s Blessings follow you in your work and deeds.

Very truly yours,
Phyllis Bozek
On behalf of the Bozek and Warnke families